In this quest for beauty that I am on, I think I have found something beautiful. Her name is Esther, and she is my daughter.
OK. So I knew that already. I think it is pretty clear that my children are the best things I could ever live for. It's just that she and I had a moment the other night.
Reuben has been sick this week. He's been very tired and, like his mother in this state, very grumpy. Early this week we skipped bathtime and I got him to bed really early, then I had Esther all to myself.
So she and I had a shower together by candlelight. Yep - that's right, by candlelight! I read something recently about occasional extra special things you can do for your children, and there was the suggestion that children may enjoy candlelit baths... which somehow led to Esther and I having a romantic shower together.
It was so lovely. She was very excited to have me in with her, and it was pretty fun for me too. We washed her hair, which went beautifully - she helped hold the flannel over her eyes and didn't even squeal once. Afterwards we tucked up on my bed and dried and combed her hair, and I had that occasional realisation that I get: I have a daughter!
Esther and I get plenty of time together without Reuben, but I am learning that there is something about bonus, unexpected time with them individually that is a real treat, and it seems to make things go so much more smoothly. I seem to have a bit of an attitude shift. I need to make it happen with Reuben more often. Actually, he did come on a little shopping trip with me this week when he was supposed to be staying at home with Gran and Esther and again, I am pleased to say it felt like a bit of a treat, rather than, well, a pain. I'll have to keep making this happen.